


Won't You Spare Him Another Year?

by geeky_ramblings



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Family Feels, Feels, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Spoilers For s14 ep17: Game Night, Wincest if you squint, could be read as wincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-07
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2020-01-06 11:24:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18387461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/geeky_ramblings/pseuds/geeky_ramblings
Summary: Sam wasn't suppose to leave him this way.





	Won't You Spare Him Another Year?

**Author's Note:**

> A lot of the dialogue is from episode 17 of Season 14: Game Night written by Meredith Glynn. I don't own it.
> 
> After seeing this episode, this scene just wouldn't leave my head and I just had to write Dean's perspective for it.
> 
> Special thanks to raving_liberal for looking this over for me.

This couldn’t be happening — he couldn’t lose Sam like this.  There were so many things unsaid between them, words that Dean wished he had said.  Yet the “I love you” never came, they turned to ash as soon as Dean opened up his mouth.  Sam was bleeding to death, the head wound beyond medical treatment, and all Dean could do was encourage Sam to stay.

He could hold back the tears, the emotions, because that’s what he did.  He had to stay strong for Sam. Dean couldn’t let his little brother see how much this was hurting him, how much he was dying inside.  If Sam died, then so would he. He had lived without his brother before, and Dean couldn’t do it then, and he certainly couldn’t do it now.  

_ “Please don’t go, please don’t leave me.  I still need you,”  _ his mind begged as Sam’s eyes  tried to stay open.

“Hey, hey!  Stay with me now.  We’re just going to play a little game.  We’re gonna count, okay. We’re gonna count.  Count with me: One, Two,” Dean said instead.  Holding back the tears, refusing to let them flow.  Dean couldn’t let Sam see that he thought all was lost; that he thought that this was the end.

“Two,”  Sam said with what little strength he had.  It was getting too hard to keep his eyes open.

“Yeah, there ya go!  Three.”

Dean tried to remain hopeful that there would be a last minute miracle, that the ambulance would come there in time and Sam would be fine.  It didn’t have to end like this — couldn’t end like this. They still had monsters to hunt, a son to raise, and an angel to annoy. They were supposed to die in a blaze of glory, not like this — anything but this.

“Dean… you — you always… always put me first.” Sam said what he needed to say while he still had strength.  He knew, however, that he was dying— that this was the end of a very long road. At the end of it all would be peace; he hoped.  For now, he had tell Dean that he knew that his older brother loved him and he loved him, too.

“Sh, Sh!  Come on… Come on, man.”

“Your whole life.”

Dean still held back; he couldn’t do this. Strength was the only thing he had now.  If he gave into the tears now, Sam would see them, and he couldn’t allow that. He just need for Sam to stay with him — to be happy, safe, and alive.   Dean, however, could feel Sam slipping as he tried to wipe the blood  wipe the blood off his little brother's brow .  His hand gripping Sam’s, Dean could feel Sam’s strength starting to slip away.   

_ “Hold on, Sam, you’ll be fine.  You have to be fine. You can’t leave me like this, damn it!  Stay for me, man. I can’t do this without you. I love you, Sam.”   _ His mind screamed as Sam lied dying on that barren road.

“Okay. Alright.  Come on, come on.  Just count with me,” Dean encouraged.

They were the only words that could find their way out of his mouth. His hope so slowly dwindling as the light Sam’s eyes began to fade.  The intelligence, the love, and the kindness were all going to be gone — fading along with Sam as he lay dying on the cold concrete.

“Sammy… Hey!”  he shouted as Sam’s eyes closed shut.

He was gone!  His brother was gone!   Dean couldn’t handle this.  He was frozen there on the desolate road, unable to move. There was nothing left for him; without Sam he wouldn’t survived.  The only reason they had lasted this long as hunters was because they had each other. Now Sam was taken away from him and he had nothing left — no hope, no will to live.  Without Sam there was no Dean. He was nothing without his brother by his side.

Everything he loved had been torn away from him.   He was about to gather Sam’s body in his arms when Jack appeared.  As Jack healed Sam, Dean prayed for the first time in years to a god he knew wouldn’t hear.  Within minutes, the eyes that had been closed opened, and Dean had to turn around to compose himself so Sam wouldn’t see what a mess he had been.

Even now he had to be strong for Sam.  Sam was his everything, and Dean was just glad that he had his little brother back.

  
  
  



End file.
